Friday, July 19, 2013

11 signs you're not ready for marriage

The truth is that marriage may not work for everyone and sometimes it's just not the "right time." For many, it is difficult to accept, however, reality, when we run the truth and that we throw ourselves blindly into a marriage, the consequences can be very painful (in some cases, a broken marriage = children = broken broken community). I am convinced that the reason why there are so many divorces, is summed up in this sentence: Most couples get married when they are not ready.
The best way to deal with a broken marriage is to anticipate because once the marriage has broken down, it is very difficult to restore. "Prevention is better than cure", it is important that we know - through signs, if we are ready for marriage.

The following are 11 signs that allow you to know if you are ready for marriage or not. I ask you to read and share this article because it could be useful to many of us.

1. You are more concerned with the wedding celebrations than the marriage itself
Often, we spend more time and anxious to devote himself to the details of the preparation of the wedding, instead of actually consider marriage in terms of union and ultimately life together. If you know more about the shades of the colors of your wedding flowers to come on budgetary difficulties your partner, then the marriage is not for you.

2. The trust is not there yet
Trust is essential. However, I find that some people do not believe it is possible to  "fully" trust anyone, including their future partner. If this is your case, then you will approach a tumultuous relationship. Trust is the belief in the integrity of your partner. No relationship can survive without trust.


3. You do not see you raise his or her children
When you start a relationship with a father or a single mother, you also start a relationship with their children. I've heard countless stories of people who say "I like the person, but I can not'' love'' his or her child (ren)." This is a very delicate situation. Children are not accessories to be included or not in your relationship with your spouse (e), they are an integral part of the equation.

4. Your relationship is too recent
This is a category where the statistics speak for themselves. Most studies show a clear distinction in the divorce rate based on the number of years a couple has lived together before committing. If you are out together and you got married in less than two years, the divorce rate may be higher. So you study for a while.

5. You are not prepared to compromise
"You can not have a successful relationship (romantic or platonic) if you are not willing to compromise. "When times are tough, we react in two ways. Either we become selfish and each closes on itself. Either we overcome all our problems and we focus on our marriage and our family. If you opt for the first reaction, the marriage is not for you.


6. You put pressure
You may marry you because of threats or ultimatums around you? If this is the case, you should not get involved. Marriage, it is the free will of two people who love and respect each other. If you are under pressure that force you to get married (like "in 30 years, you're too old", "do it for your family wants to get out of poverty", etc.), bah it's time for you to reassess the basis of your relationship with this man or woman.

7. You do not speak the language of love
The book by Dr. Gary Chapman "The 5 Love Languages" is the bible relationships. In this work, it demonstrates a very convincing that the inability to speak or receive the love language of your partner is a key element in the disaster a couple argument. Do not give love in a language he or she understands or does not receive love in "your language" means that you and your partner can never really feel true love.

8. You are not sexually attracted to each other
Plain and simple, it can be the most wonderful guy in the world and is potentially the future better husband and father on the planet, but if you're not sexually attracted to him, your relationship will crumble gradually and inevitably.


9. You (or your partner) fight against mental problems or addiction (drugs, alcohol)
In general, we do not pay enough attention to the mental illness or addiction while living a relationship .. You think going out with a'' bad boy'' or'' womanizer with alcohol problems '' (you expect to see change), while in the background, you may be dealing with a person who has a personality disorder, which is antisocial, psychopathic or sociopath have.

 a healthy mind is a prerequisite for a healthy relationship.

10. You invest more than you can afford to lose
the union of two people is also the junction of the two families and circles of friends. Social tensions are often cited as a main reason for the divorce. You have to ask yourself "what price I am in this relationship?" If you have to give your friends or family, the cost is too high. The reason being that if your relationship or marriage fails, you will be both emotionally and socially bankrupt. "It is better to be healthy alone than sick with someone else."

11. Your mind wanders always
If you are concerned about marriage because you feel that someone better could your "case", then through, waive for the moment to get married. When you get married, you should feel confident (e) that the person with whom you go join you at the altar is the best choice for you and that life without this person is unimaginable.
Get more tips on relationship @ Girl Gets Engaged 

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